When Escaping From Jail . . . Watch Your Step

In what seems like something out of a cartoon, authorities in Alton, Texas are reporting that a pair of inmates, Jesus Albert Suarez Chavez, 17, and Roman Orozco Martinez, 22, were caught attempting to escape from the jail. While capturing a prisoner is not very note worthy, how they captured one of them is. During their escape attempt through the air conditioner vents, one of the inmates fell through the ceiling into the office of Police Chief Baldemar Flores. The other inmate was captured attempting to get into the air vent. Needless to say, the walking on ceiling tiles was probably not the best way to escape.

When I heard about this I had two totally different feelings. First, I was reminded of all of the stupid criminal acts, such as robbing a police officer or asking an officer for dope. But then, the cynical side of me perked up and started to wonder if the inmates were then going to sue for possible injuries. In a world where McDonalds can be sued for hot coffee why couldn't the city or the ceiling manufacturer or installer be sued. Was there a warning in the air vent that it could not handle the weight of the person? Maybe it is me, but if we have so many stupid labels on things, maybe the air vents should have them too?

Assault with a Deadly M&M and Dad is Going to Jail Because Daughter Is Not a Graduate

Every so often, I read a story about a court case or an arrest that makes me laugh. Yesterday, two stories fit that bill.

The first comes from Des Moines, Iowa. Sean McGuire is a college student at Drake University, who was arrested for assaulting an officer with M&Ms. While the Des Moines police were questioning one of McGuire’s friends about a hit-and-run accident, McGuire starting throwing M&Ms at the police officer. When the officer turned around, an M&M hit his shoulder. The Drake University security guards noticed the M&Ms and arrested McGuire. McGuire claims that he was “sticking up for his friend.” After being arrested, he was released after posting a $1,000 bond. I understand that you should not throw things at a police officer, but was arresting him really necessary?

The second comes from Fairfield, Ohio. Brian Gegner was sentenced to 180 days in jail for contributing to the delinquency of a minor. No, he did not show a minor porn or provide alcohol. Instead, his crime was that his 18-year-old daughter, Brittany Gegner, has not obtained a high school diploma or a GED. Even though Brittany is now a legal adult, the court still had jurisdiction over Brittany’s case because the issues began when she was a minor. Brittany begged for the court’s leniency stating that she was with her mother when she skipped classes, although her father had custody. My question is, are you kidding me? At what point will society realize that parents only have so much control over their kids.